Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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