It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Dicks are not precious.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
