Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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