Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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