But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
