Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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