also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
