Kiss
Puke
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize