I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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