East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Life is so much better after having sex.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
