if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
