? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize