Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
