so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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