i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
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