You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Randomize
