he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Randomize
