some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
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