Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize
