Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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