I wannas sexs uuuuu
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
