Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
