Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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