This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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