trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
