Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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