i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
