so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I stole a fireplace last night.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
