i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize
