drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
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