The best revenge is premature balding
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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