Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
So much Jack, so little girl.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
