is wine microwaveable?
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
