I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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