Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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