...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Randomize
