OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize