So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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