well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Randomize
