we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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