what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Randomize