drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
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