I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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