I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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