all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize