mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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