One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
What did we do last night that was yellow?
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize
