Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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