I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
