If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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