it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
You did what with his pubic hair?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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