I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize
